Fartfield and Weedburn (LOL! My own re-write of the idiot scene)

Yep I haven’t made many threads here but this is some silly shit that I came up with so I got to post it. As most of you know by now one of my complaints about Prometheus is that most of the characters suck. I took the time to write a scene where I changed the names a bit and so on so it is like this.

Weedburn:

- That’s alright, I have read about this in a children’s book. I am a biologist at least I studied it to eight grade so I should know.

Fartfield:

- What makes you think that is a female?

Weedburn:

- She has tits?

The cobra hisses angrily at them, it doesn’t like rapists and life forms that have less IQ than itself.

Weedburn:

- I see her tits let me touch them. I have touched many tits before.

After all Weedburn has glasses so that indicates that his vision isn’t 100%.

Weedburn:

- She doesn’t want me to touch her tits! Maybe you should help me now, okay?

Fartfield takes his butter knife and attempts to cut the thing but it doesn’t work. In an attempt he takes his pen and tries to make it sharp with his pen-sharpener. By now Weedburn is in trouble. Weedburn:

- This isn't fair! I didn't even smoke that much today! I want more!

Fartfield stabs the thing with his pen and acidic poop spreads everywhere. They both mumble some unhearable sounds before they are slowly transformed into…. Poopmonsters!